what are you looking at?

You’ve heard the comment before.  Someone gets upset because they think you may be looking at them seeing what they are doing or thinking that you may be judging them.  It doesn’t feel good.  Not on either end of the comment.

No matter what you look at with your eyes, it doesn’t last.  Beauty doesn’t last.  Trees, mountains, roads, buildings, even paintings or photographs do not last.  Yes, I did say mountains in that list.  Why?  Because, even a mountain, over time, does wear away.  Even if it is still around after a thousand years, it doesn’t look the same.  Over the course of time, even worlds do not last.  Even stars themselves cease to exist.  At least in star form anyway.

So, what are you looking at?  What do you focus your attention on?  What is it that matters to you most?

Some look to money.  Some look to philosophy.  Some might look to contracts to make something last.  But really… Contracts don’t last.  Contracts are broken.  Contracts end.  Marriages don’t last.  Love doesn’t even last on many occasions.  The argument could be made that love doesn’t end if it is real.  With that I think I would agree.  Everyone I’ve ever loved, I still do to some extent in some way even if it has changed.

Another popular phrase is that “the grass is greener on the other side.”  People change how they feel or how they look at things because of something else they have seen or are wanting or expect.  They’ve heard that they would be happy if they have this or that.  They look at what someone else has.  They look at what they do not have.  People judge what they have by what they “see” that others have.

Being rich or being poor has little to do with how much a person has monetarily.  At least from the stand point of happiness.  The things that count can seldom be counted.  Then things that can be counted seldom really count.  While money certainly eases burdens… it can not really buy happiness.  It can not buy peace of mind.  It can not buy true love.   It really can’t buy anything but things.  And they don’t last.

So, what are you looking at?  What are you looking for?  What do you set your mind on?  Do the things you think about and value, do they last?  Or do you constantly try to keep up with “the Smith or Jones families.” (figuratively speaking – the names/families are not important)

Sometimes a person has to have a loss to find out what is important.  Sometimes it could be just some bad news that brings about a change in what is most important.  There is a song.  A Country song.  One that relates to what I’m talking about here.  It’s the one by Tim McGraw named “Live Like You Were Dying.”

Verse 1
He said I was in my early forties, with a lot of life before me
And one moment came that stopped me on a dime
I spent most of the next days, looking at the x-rays
Talking bout’ the options and talking bout’ sweet times.
I asked him when it sank in, that this might really be the real end
How’s it hit ‘cha when you get that kind of news?
Man what did ya do?
He said

I went skydiving
I went rocky mountain climbing
I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu
And I loved deeper
And I spoke sweeter
And I gave forgiveness I’d been denyin’
And he said some day I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dyin’

Verse 2
He said I was finally the husband, that most the time I wasn’t
And I became a friend, a friend would like to have
And all of a sudden goin’ fishin, wasn’t such an imposition
And I went three times that year I lost my dad
Well I finally read the good book, and I took a good long hard look
At what I’d do if I could do it all again
And then

I went skydiving
I went rocky mountain climbing
I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Shu
And I loved deeper
And I spoke sweeter
And I gave forgiveness I’d been denyin’
And he said some day I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dyin’

Like tomorrow was the end
And ya got eternity to think about what to do with it
What should you do with it
What can I do with it
What would I do with it

I went rocky mountain climbing
I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu
And man I loved deeper
And I spoke sweeter
And I watched an eagle as it was flyin’
And he said some day I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dyin’

To live like you were dyin’ (4x)

This song speaks to me.  Some of you know that I lost my father last Christmas.  This is not the only loss I’ve suffered in recent years.  It was only a few years ago that my colleagues and myself lost two fine friends.  One (Ted) was known to many because of his sarcastic wit yet very friendly manner.   He passed away at his desk at work.  I make mention of him here because I knew him and because he was a friend.  Another, a closer friend to me, (Bob) was a man full of life till the very end.  He enjoyed life.  He said what he thought.   He helped as many as he could.  He laughed, he loved, he lived.  A man well-known and appreciated and loved by his peers.  He went on cruises, drove a Zamboni, and anything else that he had on his bucket list.

That “bucket list” thing…  I’m starting one now.  A little late I know, but I am starting one anyway.  There are things I want to do.  People I want to see.  Places I want to see.  Should have started a long time ago, but, alas, its never too late to start.  If I didn’t, I’d never get many of them done.

Are they important?  Maybe not to everyone.  Many may not be even to me, but I’ll still put them down.  I’ll be happy with any of them that I can accomplish.  Why?  Because I am free.  Time is short for us all.  Even if you have 80 or so years, it is still gone in a flash.

It is important, really important, that we LIVE while we can.  That we be kind to others.  That we enjoy the beauty of what is before us.  That we recognize the value of things that can’t be counted.  That we value relationships (family, friends, colleagues, others).  That we value people.  All people.  Not just those we are close to.  Those that we don’t even know.  They all have value.  These are the things that are important.  These are the things worth “seeing.”

It doesn’t matter what has happened in your life.  You can start now.  Laughing, living, loving.

My life, your life, anyone’s life is what you make of it.  You can choose to be down.  You can choose to live in misery or pain of heart.  You can choose to be depressed or you can choose to live life more abundantly, more fully, just plain more.



I laugh, I live, I love.

(Dancing included!!!)      🙂


Author: memman

Too much to tell. There is more than what is seen on the surface of any man. Some have more layers than others. I have many.

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