(this is an edit): Let me state for the record that NO…  I am NOT depressed.  Quite the opposite is true for me.  I am including this edit for some of you as friends that have already noted a bit of concern.  Much appreciated by the way.  But this is an emphatic NO to being depressed.  I am expressing what is on my mind.  Nothing more.  It might appear that way, but, I can assure you that I am not.  Some of those that know me well and are in constant contact will know and see that this statement is true.  Thank you for your concerns.  –  Now…  on with the blog.  🙂

This particular post may stir some very angry responses.  I don’t know.

In talking with a very good friend the other day and discussing how messed up people in general are, a thought hit me as to why I am the way I am.  Yes…   I’m messed up too.  Just like everybody else.  Yes… I said like EVERYBODY ELSE.  That includes you.

Talk to any psychologist.  They will tell you.  There is no such thing as normal.  So we’re all messed up to  some degree.

Just so happens that I found at least one aspect of what messed me up to some degree.

You see… it is my opinion that I got damaged by church propaganda to some degree.  In this particular blog I am referring to the church pretense that no-one is “worthy” of God’s love.  In fact, for the most part, the charade is that you, me, everyone is unworthy of anything, even to the point of life itself. At least not in this life.

In my discussions with my friend, my thoughts went back to a song I had heard several times and even sang as a special on occasion.  The song?  “Unworthy.”  I know…  it says that “He made me worthy” but the premise still there.  The propaganda is that no-one is worthy of anything.  Not in this life.  You and I and everyone will only be worthy some day in the by & by.  AFTER YOU AND I ARE DEAD!!!  Think about it. “In the sweet by & by,” “Just Over in Glor Land,” “I’ve Got A Mansion Just Over The Hill Top.” All of them

This sad propaganda would purport that we should not feel worthy of anything.  That no-one deserves anything.  Including respect.  Including life.  Including love.

Over the last few years, I’ve opened up to my worth.  I’ve changed my views considerably about what life is and what it means.  I’ve found that I do have worth.  I’ve really always known it.  For reasons mentioned here, I’ve not really believed it to a large degree.  I has caused untold pain in my life as a result.

This is very personal and may be more than anyone really wants to know but I feel it important to share.

To take a biblical viewpoint on this with a slightly different slant (something I seem to be very capable as of late), I’d like to propose this alternative message.  We are all “worthy.”  Worthy of all that is before us.  Worthy of life.  Worthy of joy.  Worthy of peace.  Worthy of love.  Putting Jesus in this picture… were the previous not so, why would God have sent his son into the world to die for us if God did not feel us worthy.  So…  If God felt us worthy to that level, who am I to dispute such worthiness.

OK…  So I’m not so religious anymore.  I don’t really believe all that I’ve been taught.  To what level I’m not really ready to post.  Some of what I have been taught and have learned will never go away.  Of that I am certain.  Why?  Because I keep what is good, test it, prove it, and keep it.  I continue to test all that I know and believe because I continue to come upon new truth.  New to me anyway.  Not that it is new truth.  Just truth that I have found now.  There is nothing really new (Reference “Lamentations” – “nothing new under the sun”).

What caused all of this came over a number of years.  Not just the last few.  I’d even be willing to state that the beginning of my journey for a quest for this quest for truth began while in college.  It is just that in the last few years I’ve come to terms with what I held to be foundational to not necessarily be true.  A battle that I’ve been fighting within myself for years.  That is and has always been my quest.  Truth.

So…  my take on this…  and one thing I hold true that I’ve been taught over and over and believe…  test what you are told, believe what is true no matter what.

Truth always prevails.

Note:  This will not be the end of this.  Much more could be and may should be said.  Just this last comment for now.  I’m happier with myself now than I have ever been.  I’m thankful just to be who I am right now.  There is much to be said for understanding at least a little of what it means to just be.  To be still of mind and content of heart enough to be open to truth.


Author: memman

Too much to tell. There is more than what is seen on the surface of any man. Some have more layers than others. I have many.

5 thoughts on “Propaganda”

  1. Dan..I didn’t find this controversial at all…in fact your thoughts put into words exactly what I have been thinking myself.

    I’ve been reading the book “Captivating” and it speaks about how God loves a woman and why.

    The bible says ‘God created Man then Women so that man wouldn’t be alone’. Now why would God create Man? Why would God make a woman so different than a man? What does God want from us?

    The commandments say “Love God with all our hears, minds and bodies? Sounds to me like He whats us to love Him so he can have a relationship with us?
    God wants to be loved by us as much as we want to be loved by others.

    If the baggage we carry around so troublesome and we can’t fix ourselves…maybe we’ve been asking the wrong person to fill the gap??

    God created us…He loves us more and better than any father could love his child.
    Even when we mess up our Dad (usually) forgive us and still love us. Why would God be any different?

    Truth…we know there is evil out there..and the devil or whatever you want to call him does not want us to have a relationship with he’ll lie to us. Make us believe we aren’t worthy by comparing God to an unloving Dad. That is NOT what God is…however God wants to be pursued just like we do..

    1. I appreciate your response but feel that we have some very basic differences in our understanding of certain things I do not care to discuss openly on this blog. I’ll respond directly to your email.

  2. Not that I don’t understand or FULLY disagree with what you intend by your comment “Ok… So I’m not so religious anymore.” But from what I know of you, I would say you are possibly more “religious” in the more authentic sense, than you were before. In the sense of wanting to know more about who Jesus really was, and how that is so fully relevant for us… even though we have come to realize, that the church, history and even scripture has undoubtedly hidden much about “the real man” Jesus… undoubtedly thinking that they were doing not only a good thing, but a holy thing… for the same reasons that the Pharisees in his time thought that they were “beyond Jesus’ teaching”, and consequently thought Jesus was not only arrogant in his claims, but a heretic.
    Undoubtedly there were many groups, scribes, etc. through time, who have felt the need to “clean up” the story a bit, in wanting to make him more marketable. I’m glad that at least being “born in a manger” and “death on a cross” was not removed for sanitation purposes. I can see how it would be easy to do. Christians historically have wanted to “draw” people to the story. And frankly a shiny bright beautiful angel can look much preferable to the senses, than a bloody mess of a man hanging from a cross, as the one who is saving us. But that is the paradox. If we don’t fully relate our “messes” with the “mess” that he fully received. We’re missing the point.
    What Jesus said he cared about was more “abundant life”, knowing he had to show us more about love in order for us to have any sense of what he even meant by that term “abundant life”. Well, it appears that “life more abundant” is what you are discovering, by using your own intuitive radar as your guide for both discovery and for providing direction, as well as being a more reliable source for establishing: “what truths you can really rely on”… not just because someone else says so… we can have direct experience with it… in essence… if we don’t really first doubt it, and put it to a strong test within ourselves first… then we don’t really ever believe it. Something has to “abide” in us very deeply, I believe, to make it into the category of “our belief”.
    I know that what I primarily believe… when “the rubber meets the road”… rests primarily in my unconscious. So when people ask me what I believe, I can genuinely say “well I’m still learning about that.” Which is not to say that my beliefs are any less deep or reliable, in terms of the status of my soul, than someone who emphatically shouts their beliefs daily. It is my belief that, that a person’s “true beliefs” are at least as much a mystery to them as mine are to me. But they do not know it. Many that I have witnessed “sharing” their beliefs, are doing so as a facade, “for the sake of their salvation”. This is what they have come to believe you must do, not only to get to heaven yourself, but to get others to heaven as well… to get others to pick up the facade like they did, apparently thinking that this is a game that God requires of us in order to make it to heaven.
    To me spirituality is far too important. I tend to think it’s not something you can “fake it til you make it”. I tend to think the more honest and open you can be every step of the way, the closer you are to the truth, every step of the way. A facade or act, of any kind, I believe puts distance between yourself and the truth. And I also believe, that to follow that “facade” is to deprive yourself of that abundant life that Jesus lived and spoke of.
    I personally applaud doubt, and earnest seeking of whatever one “finds to be true”, because I think I can safely say, that one of my beliefs is that, it’s all about the journey…
    and if you run across a “truth” that won’t stand up to most profound doubt and testing, you are never going to really carry it as a true “belief” anyway. Because only what we have truly put to the strongest test will we dare to carry… at the “life or death”, nitty gritty level of our deepest belief.
    And like you said at the end Dan, you’ve got to get very still, and just be, to even look closely, and honestly enough at yourself to perceive what is true for yourself. You are courageous to do so… I believe… because I know it takes courage for me…

  3. As a follow up on this Dan, something else has struck me about what you wrote here. But after your comments, I found myself wanting to back up and see if I could find some value in what you referred to as messages of our “unworthiness” from the church. And this is what I see: I do believe our society and our world has gone through long periods of time, hundreds, even thousands of years identifying ourselves with our egos… meaning, what we think, feel, say, do, roles we play as parent, teacher,spouse, etc… and this ego of ours, does tend to become quite narcissistic, mainly when it begins to think that it, (the ego), is who you are.
    To say it more simply, our ego is quite inadequate as an identity. Consequently, when we identify ourselves with it, we feel WE are inadequate. It’s like… something is missing… and this may well lead to feeling… “unworthy”.

    But as we learn to pull back from our ego, and view it as if from a third party perspective, we are not then so trapped in our subjective experience, making us quick to jump into reactive mode! And pulling out of the subjective stance to see a larger, more objective view, we actually gain a priceless new perspective on… ourselves… and consequently on everything! Literally.
    We begin to grow in surprising ways. And in this new more objective mode, we not only “understand” our own weaknesses and shortcomings, with greater depth… often to the point that we may lose the need to defend ourselves at all sometimes… that very understanding gives us the perceptiveness and wisdom not to judge others, as we, quite naturally and easily understand others better as well… and as I see this one simple thing happening, I begin to see people living more in harmony with each other… things are more fun…
    Here is my point. In as much as we are stuck in an existence, trapped within the confines of our own egos and defenses… thinking that THIS is who we are… then yes, that unintentional “mis-identification” of ourselves IS unworthy of being named, as our identity… appropriately so… because even if we THINK that is who we are, it is not.
    However, that part that can step back away from our thinking, feeling and doing, and view it with objectivity… that part I believe is eternal… and worthy would be an understatement in an attempt to describe it. I certainly do not have words for it. Even stepping back to look at your “self” for a minute or two can very well bring life-changing insight, when one is ready to risk taking that honest look… even the framework for creating an image for who we think we are, is such a miraculous task in and of itself. When you really do that… you begin to see that there may literally be no bounds for who we can be… if we are not confined to the ego alone. For me, doing so leaves me with nothing less than a feeling of awe… So…
    What was I saying…
    Oh yeah, unworthy… so the church… if it is saying our egos are unworthy of the title: “I Am”… a title Jesus was deemed “worthy” of… and he spoke of wanting that more abundant life for us that he knew intimately… that does seem to indicate he thinks we are worthy… Hmm… Maybe we are…

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